you know your a wrestling nut when…
Posted by spslfan on 12/11/2005, 1:02 am
i got this off of california wrestling.
You know you’re a wrestling nut when…
You know you’re a wrestling nut when…
– You take your family on vacation to Fargo, ND in the summer
– One of the rooms in your house has a mat down and is “the wrestling room”
– At Thanksgiving dinner you watch what you eat.
– The only t-shirts you own have something to do with wrestling
– You find yourself over the course of a tournament reffing, working a table, and coaching all at once.
– You have a recurring dream that you are 10 pounds over right before weigh-ins, and you wake up from the dream and check your weight.
– You hit a hard sprawl whenever someone drops down to tie their shoe-laces.
– Your homepage is a wrestling site.
– You strip down to the nude before stepping on any scale… like at your doctor’s office in front of the nurse… or even the big scale at the carnival in front of the “Guess-Your-Weight” guy.
– You’ve taped your laces on your shoes… ever.
– You teach junior to handfight and look away from a half before he is out of diapers.
– You can’t help but snicker when someone tells you they missed lunch and they are feeling light-headed.
– You get ‘that look in your eye’ when everyone else is just horsing around in the back yard… and then you drop your uncle on his head.
– When you walk by a music store in the mall instead of breaking out into song and dance, you break out into shadow wrestling and stance.
– Your fiancé is ticked to learn that you’ve paid the reception DJ extra $ to put together a Lunatic Fringe – Eye of the Tiger – Thunderstruck medley for your first dance together as husband & wife.
– The lady cutting your hair at the local salon is afraid to touch your ears
– Prior to the bride making her grand entry into the wedding, the groom and groomsmen come running into the sactuary with Eye of the Tiger blaring over the speakers.
– You have to break out a tighter belt every winter to keep your pants up.
– Your first date with future wife/husband is at a wrestling match.
– You plan your wedding around wrestling season!
– Someone asks you if you know any wrestlers from where they go to college and you name off the entire roster from 125-285, wrestlers that wrestled for them in the past, and incoming freshman.
– People gather around you at the a tournament and point to a mat and ask you who’s wrestling and you give them the wrestlers name, the school he’s from, the grade he’s in and what place he took in his conference tournament.
– Everytime you go to shake hands with someone, you have to fight off the urge to arm drag them.
– ‘High Crotch’ is not an offensive statement.
– The only time you have been in a particular city or state was when at a wrestling event… and you remember the year, the event, it’s participants, etc.
– You laugh when anyone short of Ghandi says, “I’m starving.”
– You find a seat at a big tournament where you can watch eight matches at once.
– You never intend to lose weight on purpose ever again.
– You continually spit because you think it will make you lose weight.
– If you yell at your niece to grab a spladle to serve the gravey at Thanksgiving dinner instead of saying ladle.
– When talking wrestling, some guy starts harping about WWF and your blood pressure jumps over 30 points.
– You spot cauliflower ear in public places.
– For christmas you ask for tickets and hotel room to nationals and take vacation days from work to attend.
– If you’ve ever been at a tournament and had someone come up and introduce themselves by their screenname from a wrestling forum.
– After a long two-day HS Fri-Sat tournament you wake up at 5:00 AM to drive kids to a youth tournament on Sunday.
– While driving through the Midwest, you decide to make a detour through Stillwater, OK to visit the National Wrestling Hall of Fame.
– You talk to a complete stranger for an hour if you both have wrestled.
– You talk about Pliev and Abdurakmanov, and the person you are talking to thinks you are talking about something medical.
– You are giving blood, and it occurs to you that this may have been a very efficient yet overlooked method for dropping that last half-pound.
– You’re excited to get the flu or have the runs because you know making weight is now that much easier.
– The phrase “five on two” doesn’t make you think of an unfair fight.
– You’ve ever showed up to gym class with tights, gym clothes, a sweatsuit, and another few layers of clothing on.
– Someone is choking at a resturant and somebody comes behind and applies the Heimelich manuver you give the locked hands signal.
– You stop at every drinking fountain you see and remember the good old days when you were dehyrated and couldnt have a sip!
– You wrestle around with an unsuspecting family pet on a daily basis.
– Your family tries to hide every time you talk about a new wrestling move you learned, cause they know you are going to want to try it out on one of them.
– If the best thing you have ever tasted in your life is warm water after making weight.
– You still want to body toss your wife of 18 years when hugging.
– You want to choke someone that calls a singlet a unitard.
– You know how to lose 10 lbs in less than 24 hours and are capable of gaining it back in less than 2.
– You make all your relatives weigh-in before Thanksgiving dinner and weigh out after.
– When anyone is sitting on your lap you are thinking about a crab ride
– Fifteen years after you last weighed in, you are still pleased after a good ..2 bathroom experience because of the weight you lost.
– You’ve slept with plastics on.
– You’ve slept with a trash bag on.
– Every bathroom in your house has Amateur Wrestling News for its reading material, regardless of how old it is.
– 20 years and 30 pounds later, it still seems like a good idea to look at yourself in the mirror in a singlet.
– If you’ve ever executed a wrestling move with for the greater good. Such as breaking up a bar fight, arresting a criminal, etc.
– Said to someone, “watch this” when a football player is lipping off to one of your wrestling buddies just before the inevitable happens.
– You yell “RIDE HIM! HIPS! HIPS!” and it has no sexual meaning whatsoever.
– When holding your newborn nephew, you notice that his potentially stocky frame will be perfect for the world’s oldest and greatest sport.
– Your dog is trained to wrestle. First you shake hands, then wrestle. After you pin or tech him, you shake again and he’s good after that.
– When anyone who says, “I’m starving” deserves a swift backhand across the face.
– When you cant go on a date without mentioning wrestling in conversation.
– When you look on your cell phone and see that 90% of your friends and names are wrestlers, former, past, or current.
– You are on this forum 12 months a year.
– You have to stay at work an extra hour because you spent all afternoon posting on usaeverett.com – You’ve ever sleep-walked to the fridge and chugged milk.
– You know the difference between being hurt and being injured.
– Movie night means watching Vision Quest.
– More than half of your Internet Explorer bookmarks are wrestling sites.
– You have a reoccurring dream that you are back in high school at the state tournament, with another chance to win that elusive state title. No one seems to notice or care that you are slightly balding, middle-aged, and at least 30 pounds overweight, with little to no flexibility. You blow thru the bracket, teching or pinning anyone who dares to step on the mat with you until you reach the finals, when you are rudely awakened by a sharp elbow to the ribs from your obviously annoyed wife who says, “wake up and stop mauling me, you must be having that stupid dream again.”